1. When I was a child, I believed everything that I was told and used that information to form my grasp on reality, as most children subconsciously do. If you tell a child that the sky is purple, assuming they have no prior knowledge, they will try to rationally map that word to the semantic definition that it’s representing, that is, the actual color of the sky which is blue. If in the future, the child is then also told that Barney is purple, they may come to the conclusion that the word “purple” is more broad than they realized, containing both the semantic definition of “blue” and “purple”. When someone shows them what “blue” is, they may have a hard time rationalizing this until they realize that they need to throw out the information that was originally presented to them, specifically that the sky is in fact, not purple.
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3. I know this probably sounds really convoluted, but the point I’m making is that we are presented with information in life that we draw conclusions with. Whether or not information is true or false is vetted by its consistency within our logical framework by which we discern the truth of the world. That is: we have a worldview with which we process reality around us. If someone tells you today that the sky is purple, you know that they’re just off their rocker. But what if the information presented to you is true, but it doesn’t align with your worldview? How would you handle this? Most people, if confronted this way, have what is known as cognitive dissonance, or a resistance to information that challenges their notion of how the world works. I’m no exception, but I have always strived in life to be objective even when it goes against what I’m comfortable or familiar with.
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5. In 2018 I was presented with information that completely challenged my way of perceiving the world. It made it impossible for me to live within the framework that I had prior.
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7. This is that story.
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11. A little bit of my background as a person: growing up I was always a very gifted kid when it came to math and science. I started taking advanced courses back in elementary school and that would carry through my middle school and high school life. I took honors courses, AP courses, and even graduated college early in just three years. I never was really religious, but I did attend some services with my parents growing up. I didn’t believe in God since I did not have any evidence to support his existence, but I called myself an agnostic since I had no means of proving he did not exist.
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13. Throughout middle school, high school, and parts of college, I was often plagued with fits of depression. Believing in the origin story that I was told in school, I wrestled with the reality of my own insignificance. We are told that we are nothing more than stardust which has gained sentience through some miraculous (but certainly unguided and undirected) process. In light of this, it is only natural and logical to make the conclusion that one’s own life serves no inherent meaning other than to make meaning for yourself. For me at that time, that meant playing video games and just enjoying myself to the fullest (and pursued whatever it was that I desired (going so far as to take Japanese classes in college to play Eroge)).
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15. During college, I wound up with a group of friends who were big into video games and binge drinking. We would often spend our weekends playing 3+ rounds of Beeriokart, smoking weed intermittently and very infrequently doing other hard drugs. I would often philosophize during these moments about what life’s purpose was, and would sometimes research things like physics or whatever else while my friends would watch or play Fortnite (among other things). During one of my research sessions, I came across the work of Christopher Langan, and I started reading his paper called “The Cognitive Theoretic Model of the Universe.” This paper had very mixed reception, some people calling it genius, and others calling it incomprehensible hogwash. For me this presented itself like a challenge: “bet I can figure it out,” I thought to myself.
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17. I read the paper, and there were two major conclusions that I drew from it that I thought I’d bring up. The first one was this: “the abstract currency of nature is information.” Or put in more literal terms, everything in life is at a fundamental level built from information. The second observation I realized was that since there exists information that is metastatic (meaning it does not change nor is subject to time or space), it is separate and distinct. The conclusion that can be deduced from this is that there must exist an immaterial, distinctly separate metastatic conglomerate of information that encodes the consistent logical framework from which reality is capable of propagating from. That is sort of a mouthful, but essentially what that means is that life had to be derived from some kind of intellect. The reason for this conclusion comes from the following concept.
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19. Consider the number seven. Seven is something we observe in reality, in that we can count things and conceptually understand it, but seven does not exist in reality. We cannot see “seven”, we cannot touch “seven”, and yet it is real. Essentially, seven only exists within the human mind. Seven also has properties, such as the fact that it is a prime number. The reason why seven is a prime number is built into the laws of logic and mathematics. Some may argue that we created these definitions, but whether or not we understand or have ways of communicating about the idea is irrelevant to the logical truth embedded within the words we speak or use to define it. If you were to try to conceive of a reality in which 7 was not a prime number, the reality you would be trying to conceive of would no longer be self consistent. It is essentially impossible because it would collapse under its own impracticality. It’s the same idea as saying 2+2=5. If that were true, abstractly speaking, the whole nature of numbers and reality itself would not be possible. The same thing can be said about the fine structure constant, or of E and PI. These numbers are what they are by definition and necessity and cannot be changed.
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21. This truth embedded in numbers is the greatest example of a universal constant of nature which is outside of space and time. Reality itself is essentially subject to a logical framework which is timeless, immaterial, and logical self-referential and self-consistent. In realizing this truth, there was a moment in which it sunk in that such an entity is no different from God. In fact, many scriptures in the Bible speak of God in this way, and many of the lyrics of this very song also demonstrate that.
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23. “I am that I AM” - He is what always is, the essential truths of reality which are not just limited to logic, but also love, and envy and the abstract perfected aspects of the immaterial.
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25. “You cannot see me” - His attributes are evident throughout creation in that his order and intellect and love can be seen in the ways things are made, but he himself is not visible.
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27. And the list goes on.
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29. Ultimately. I am a Christian for a lot more reasons than just this little thought exercise. I have seen the way he has revealed himself to me and has changed my life. I recognize the broken nature of reality and the need for someone to fix it. I also recognize the broken nature in my own heart and my own need to be healed and made whole. If you have read this, I appreciate that. It may not have made sense, but for me it has made a huge difference in my life. I do believe by faith that God exists, but it is a faith that is grounded in understanding the nature of reality around me. The mere idea that I used to believe that all of reality in its order, beauty, and creativity simply came about through literal RNG (randomness) astounds me for my own level of ignorance. It is simply foolishness and self deceit.
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31. If you yourself desire to know this God, the one true creator God, it starts by first understanding that he is the all powerful truth by which all things are sustained by. Next, realize your position before him as someone who has gone his or her own way apart from God. Third, believe that God has told the truth in the Bible that he has atoned for your rebellion through the death of Jesus Christ. Lastly, repent of your sin and choose to honor God and live according to what he has called us to, which is a life wholly submitted unto him.
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33. If you’re serious about this: consider reading 1 John. It takes 15 minutes. If you finish that, read The Gospel of John and then Romans and then the whole new testament. You have likely been told many things about what Christianity says and believes, it’s time for you to find it out for yourself.
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35. Here is a playlist for evidence for the bible (answers the question "has God spoken").
36. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EjnwldgqN8c&list=PLZ3iRMLYFlHuhA0RPKZFHVcjIMN_-F596
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40. My core beliefs:
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42. I believe in God the Father as the metastatic truth of reality. I believe in the Son as the embodiment of his character and attributes made into flesh and blood. I believe in the Holy Spirit as the recursive feedback loop by which reality is sustained through his omniscience and omnipresence.
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44. I believe in a literal Genesis account. Mankind's genetics were made perfect at the creations, along with all other kinds of animals, and through the fall, genetics became fragmented. Evolutionary biology is the result of losses of genetic information, not the addition of new. Adaptation is a result of specialization from the master blueprint. Any example in modern science is consistent with this idea of microevolution and I have yet to be presented with an irrefutable proof of macro fish -> bird type evolution.
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46. I believe that the world is fallen and corrupted with sin, which is simply the ability to go against God’s order, purpose, design and direction.
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48. I believe in the authority of scripture. It is divinely inspired in that it has told truth before it has happened.
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50. I believe that because of mankind's sin, we have sinned against the infinite and holy God whose value is infinite and therefore our punishment deserved is likewise infinite in scale.
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52. I believe that Jesus was crucified and rose again three days later as prophesied by the scriptures, and is the fulfillment of the old testament prophecies (he is the Messiah, the son of the living God).
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54. I do not believe in a pre-tribulation rapture. I believe that the church will undergo the persecution of the antichrist before being raptured prior to God pouring out his wrath on the world (aka I believe in pre-wrath rapture).
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56. I believe that God is personable and desires that all should come to repentance to put their faith in him.
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59. And I am not ashamed to say these things publicly.